A Biblical View of Masculinity

At Trace, we believe it is essential to clarify the boundaries that help us follow Jesus faithfully. One area that often brings confusion, tension, and strong opinions is masculinity, manhood, and the responsibility God gives to Christian men.

This subject can surface bias, strong opinions, and painful experiences. So before exploring it, we must do one important thing. We set aside bias and allow Scripture to breathe. The goal is not to protect personal preference. The goal is to understand what God designed and why.

Why Has Toxic Masculinity Become a Cultural Narrative?

The cultural conversation around masculinity has shifted dramatically. The phrase “toxic masculinity” has been used often, and it has become a major part of how many people think about men in leadership.

Why? The simplest answer is this. Toxic masculinity has been real and harmful. Spiritual abuse in the church has overwhelmingly come from men who misused authority and ignored responsibility. Christian husbands have historically diminished their wives’ voices, demanded obedience, and misrepresented what biblical leadership is meant to look like.

Where men used responsibility instead of force, authority became something safe, honoring, and life giving. But where men used authority to elevate themselves, it produced toxicity.

So, we begin here. We acknowledge this has happened. We admit that this has been painful. If you have experienced toxic male leadership within the church or in your home, we see you and we grieve what you endured.

But acknowledging the problem does not mean dismantling God’s design. If we break apart what God created for our flourishing, we create greater damage. Healthy masculinity does not need to be deconstructed. It needs to be developed.

God’s Design From the Beginning

Scripture is clear: “So God created human beings in His own image. In the image of God He created them. Male and female He created them.”  Genesis 1:27

We do not complete the image of God without both a man and a woman. That has never been a debate of value or worth. It has always been a matter of distinct roles and responsibilities.

Paul writes again: “There is no longer Jew or Gentile, slave or free, male and female. For you are all one in Christ Jesus.”
Galatians 3:28

Equal value and equal worth. Different purposes and responsibilities. One does not diminish the other.

Where Masculinity Went Wrong

If there is a single root cause of toxic masculinity it is this:

Men tried to elevate authority instead of carrying responsibility.

When authority becomes more important than responsibility it always leads to toxicity, pride, and control. When responsibility is embraced, leadership becomes sacrificial, life giving, and safe.

This is the picture Paul gives in Ephesians 5.

The Biblical Framework for Christian Manhood

Paul teaches mutual submission: “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” Ephesians 5:21

Mutual submission sets the tone before the passage says anything about marriage. Husbands have one form of submission. Wives have another. Neither cancels the other.

Wives are called to submit to their husbands. Husbands are called to submit to their wives by loving them as Christ loved the church.

Christ did not love the church by demanding obedience. He loved by:

• Serving

• Sacrificing

• Surrendering personal preference

• Giving His life for the good of others

Christ gave up His life, not just at the cross, but every day as He surrendered His will to the Father.

Therefore Christian men are called to lead the same way. Leadership is not control. Leadership is service and sacrifice.

The Bible does not assign husbands the most authority. It assigns husbands the most responsibility.

When we ignore responsibility and cling to authority, toxicity grows. When we embrace responsibility and serve the people around us, faith grows.

Do Not Dismantle God’s Design

Where there has been abuse, we confront it. Where men have caused harm, we confess it. Where leadership has failed, we lament it.

But we do not respond by deconstructing God’s design for manhood. We strengthen it.

Healthy masculinity reflects the character of Christ. Godly men:

• lead through service

• sacrifice for the good of their family

• protect spiritual health

• encourage faith

• create safe, honoring environments

• model humility, prayer, and obedience

• carry responsibility before they ask for authority

This is what we must recover. Not toxic masculinity, but Christlike masculinity.

When Life Is Messy

We know real life does not always match the biblical ideal. Some husbands are spiritually disengaged. Some wives feel alone and unsupported in the home. Some marriages have ended painfully. Some men feel disqualified by past failures.

To the women who feel spiritually alone: if you need to lead your children toward Jesus, do so boldly. God will honor faithfulness.

To the men who feel like it is too late: it is never too late to follow Jesus with renewed devotion. Start today. God blesses a man who surrenders to Christ and models His character, even if the past has been difficult.

The cross of Jesus is not the place where shame increases. The cross is the place where shame dies. We come back to the cross because the blood of Jesus still forgives, restores, and transforms.

A Word of Hope

If you feel discouraged, overwhelmed, or regretful, hope is available today. The same power that raised Jesus from the grave is at work within His church. We can walk forward with confidence, no matter how messy our stories have been.

We do not have to abandon God’s design. We do not have to dismantle masculinity. We are called to develop men who lead like Jesus and to honor women who walk with wisdom, strength, and faith.

Hope is ours to take today.